Back at the gym
Yes back at the gym and so far am making it most days just have to be flexible with my times and as long as I go it can be anywhere from morning to lunch or late evening. Still having trouble tightening up on my eating, its like I still think i am pregnant or something that, and the lack of time I have been having. Having said that Bailey has finally settled now he is on reflux medicine. Why does it take a mother having to diagnose their child and seeing like 3 different pedietricians before someone actually listens. I knew this was the problem fromt the start, but hey I am just a mother without any dr's qualifications. Anyhow he is in a routine at night thank god, usually feeds at 9.30 that up around 2.30 then up around 5.30 or 6.00 but back down until 9am. So really that's just up once a night and i am feeling better for it. If hubby is home then I get to sleep in until 9am as he gets up with Jay. If he works night shift then its a pain cause I get up early to feed Bailey and by the time he goes down Jay is up.He doesn't sleep much during the day but mum bought us a baby swing and it has been a lifesaver, at least I can put him in there most of the day and he will dose or just look around. He hates the pram but I just figured out why today. We went to a xmas party and after feeding him I put him in there. He just screamed. We have a phil and ted so the toddler sit is above where Bailey lies. He can't see anything so of course when I took the toddler seat off he could see a whole new world. He sat in the pram for 2 hours just looking around. Now this is so different to the screaming child I had 2 weeks ago so things are really falling into place. I actually have time now to sit and have a cup of tea.
Need to get this diet under control though. Every Monday I start and after a couple of days it just goes to shit. I am weighing 62kilos and need to get to 55. I know many people are probably thinking this isn't bad 5 weeks after giving birth but I feel like crap and won't my body back.
On another note mum starts chemo tomorrow and I am feeling more positive about this situation. Hopefully this fixes it all. The hardest thing is having no support at this terrible time from mum and dad. Don't get me wrong its not all about me I am just so emotionally drained from the trouble with Bailey to this cancer with mum and it just gets hard sometimes carrying all this around and trying to go to doctors appointments with Bailey and having a toddler going through the terrible 2's who I just need someone to look after sometimes as he gets so bored and naughty when I take him. Anyhow, mentally so far I think I am ok no post natal depression so far so fingers crossed.
posted by sarahz @ 4:15 AM
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